Peace, Peace

Monday night, I went to see the River City Men's Chorus in concert. As usual they were incredible. A particular song that was amazing was called "Peace, Peace". It was beautiful. I cannot even describe the amazement that was in that place. A captain in the US Air Force sang the solo. The solo was sang in German. I've never heard a more beautiful way to sing "Silent Night," which also happens to be my favorite Christmas carol. I was going to type out all the lyrics to "Peace, Peace" but I can't find the words. So, here is "Silent Night":

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Silent night, holy night

All is calm, all is bright

Round yon Virgin Mother and Child

Holy Infant so tender and mild

Sleep in Heavenly peace

Sleep in Heavenly peace.

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Silent night, holy night!

Shepherds quake at the sight

Glories stream from Heaven afar

Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia!

Christ, the Savior is born

Christ, the Savior is born

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Silent night, holy night

Son of God, love's pure light

Radiant beams from Thy holy face

With the dawn of redeeming Grace

Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth!

Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth!

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The combination of the music and the words in this song makes me want to fall in love. I'm not sure why. The thought that someOne was born and with that birth there is so much commotion. "Shephers quake" "Glories stream from Heaven" That someOne is greatly Majestic and Indescribable. That is just incredible to me. That the whole earth stopped when our Savior was born.

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"Silent Night" is my favorite Christmas carol, what's yours?

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-katie

American Dream

Jonathan preached this morning and as usual it was amazing. He takes the scripture apart and makes it easier to understand. Today's lesson was on Mary's song located in Luke 1:46-55.

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Everyone wants the American Dream. They want life as they imagine it. How can life be as they imagine it? We can't fathom what our lives will be. So what is important in our lives? People think that growing in stature with friends and the community and in education is vital to living and coping in the world today. But, is that really important? Are all these things vital to surviving in this world? To an extent, I think yes. There is a part of me that says "no" also. Jonathan talked about our importance to God. We have a heavenly responsibility to live our life for God and to honor Him with all that we do. I fail at that daily. It's not hard to make someone happy, right? But to please the indescribable Creator of the universe...wow. What a thought.

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"And Mary said:

'My soul glorifies the Lord

and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,

for he has been mindful

of the humble state of his servant.

From now on all generations will call me blessed,

for the Mighty One has done great things for me-

holy is his name.

His mercy extends to those who fear him,

from generation to generation.

He has performed might deeds with his arm;

he has scattered those who are proud

in their inmost thoughts.

He has brought down rulers from their thrones

but has lifted up the humble.

He has filled the hungry with good things

but has sent the rich away empty.

He has helped his servant Israel,

remembering to be merciful

to Abraham and his descendants forever,

even as he said to our fathers.'"

Luke 1:46-55

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Despite what Mary was asked to do, she obeyed. Why was it so simple for her, a teenaged girl of low stature, to obey God's command through Gabriel so easily? She didn't question God. She didn't made excuses. She didn't freak out. She just accepted it. She accepted that this was her life's plan. She was at peace with what her life was about to be. How many of us can say that we are good with our life right now? We have loved ones who are dying of diseases and ones who are already gone. We have friends who are suffering from loss and heartache. We are going through financial hard times. We are suffering from loss and heartache. Why is it so hard to just accept that this is our life and that we are living with these different life issues?

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Another question he asked was 'what is our song?'. How does our song portray our life? I would hope that my life's song would give people a peace. The song would be able loving life and living it for God in the midst of hard times. God is always with us and never leaves. I wish that everyone would know that.

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Sorry that this post was random and pretty scattered. Just something on my mind.

-katie

Waiting

"So the LORD must wait for you to come to Him

so He can show you His love and compassion.

For the LORD is a faithful God.

Blessed are those who wait for His help."

Isaiah 30:18

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I saw this verse on a friend's status and, wow, does it speak volumes!! And it does speak so loudly, especially right now. God has put an opportunity in front of us, just as I mentioned in my last post. Well, that news that I could've revealed will not be revealed just yet. Some plans fell through, so we have to reschedule and I get to keep you in suspense for a while longer.

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Waiting is so hard for me. I've never been good at it. Ever. Why would I want to wait for something when I could just as easily have it right then?? Well, would I have the same appreciation for it if I had gotten it in the first place? Probably not, which is most likely why I didn't get it in the beginning. But, in all seriousness, I thank God for what I have struggled for. I know that I have gotten it in His timing or it would not have worked out. My appreciation for material and personal things are way higher than I have been in the past.

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But then again, waiting has it's perks. Your trust builds, especially in God. I think I'm finally in a place where I can give it to Him and let Him handle it and completely trust Him with it. He knows me best and knows how my life is going to work out. Can you imagine if you knew how everyone's lives were going to turn out--what was going to happen in their lives--could control it? It's an indescribable thought. I can't even fathom the power.

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God is so good! I just pray that He continues to bless me and my family and friends! I cannot wait to see what He does!!

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katie

Thank You, Lord!

No pictures of food to display, so, I'm sorry to disappoint you! Here are some pictures from the weekend! I love my family!

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God has an amazing opportunity for me and Mom. I cannot wait to share it with you! We will find out tomorrow if it's a "yes" or "no" from God. We have been praying for a "yes" obviously, but who knows what He'll do. I have been praying for His Will to be done. And to God be the glory. I cannot wait to see what happens!!

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I hope your holiday was blessed with family and friends!!

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-katie

For Freedom

I've been thinking a lot about people going into the Army. My cousin, Blake, is in the US Army. My good friend, Kristin, is in the US Air Force. My other cousin, Tony, is in the military, but I'm not sure which branch.

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Blake and I are best friends. He's getting married in April to Tara, who I love. I'm in their wedding as a bridesmaid and I couldn't be happier to be there to support Blake. I know that God has a plan for Blake, Tara, and Dawson's lives. His Word says so in Jeremiah 29:11. Blake is set to be deployed next summer, I think. And I don't know how I'm going to handle him leaving or being gone for a year. HE has a plan. I just have to keep telling myself that. This song is so incredible. It's so powerful and inspiring. I cry every time I hear it because I think of Blake.

Somewhere a trumpet sounds in the night

A soldier is standing there

It's calling him out to the stars and stripes

It's calling him God knows where.

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He kisses the ones he loves good-bye

And leaves in the dead of night.

For freedom he'll heed the call

Leave all he knows

And for freedom he'll stand and fight.

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And somewhere a man and wife

can't believe they're waving their girl good-bye

For gone are the days of pig-tails and curls and candlelit lullabies.

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If they had their way she'd stay young forever

And never be far from home.

But freedom has drawn her heart to danger's shore

And for freedom they'll let her go.

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And somewhere a thunderous crash in the night;

It echoes all through the hills.

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Though many escape it's wrath and it's rage

A soldier lies wounded still.

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Remembering the land he loves; he cries

I've loved you with all my might

For freedom said I'm her son whatever comes

And for freedom I'll say good-bye.

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And somewhere beneath the stars and the sky

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Our flag is still standing there

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She bled and she brought one land under God

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Her colors still lead us there

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She's carried the lives of those before us

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She's buried the bold and brave

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For freedom she holds our hopes and hand up high

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And for freedom she'll ever wave.

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Silence and Awe

I haven't had a lot to say lately and I'm not sure why. Maybe because the people at my job are driving me nuts. Maybe it's because I have to change some things in my life right now that I don't necessarily want to--at all. Maybe it's because I've just been thinking instead of talking.

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"Be still and know that He is God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in all the earth."

Psalm 46:10

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I've been reading the Psalms lately. And I couldn't be happier reading them. Now, granted, I'm not in that 46th chapter just yet...but I'm getting there. I love reading the Psalms. The words bring joy to my heart and the knowledge that He is with me all the time. He holds me close and never forgets about me.

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"Keep me as the apple of your eye.

Hide me in the shadow of your wings."

Psalm 17:8

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He doesn't ignore me. He hears whenever I call out to Him. How powerful! I am the scum of the Earth to Him and yet; He still wants a relationship with me. Awesome. I have done Him so wrong and still He loves me. That absolutely blows my mind.

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"The Lord has heard my cry for mercy;

the Lord accepts my prayer."

Psalm 6:9

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This really neat this happened at work on Wednesday. As you probably know, it was Veteran's Day and we were giving free smoothies for anyone in a service uniform. These two people in uniform came in to order and it was clearly their first time, right in the middle of the lunch rush--no doubt. As they were ordering, this lady behind them caught my attention and mouthed the words, "I want to pay for their meal." So the couple finished ordering and after I took the smoothie prices off they were left with a certain amount and the lady behind them stepped up and said, "I would like to pay for your meal to say 'Thanks for serving our country.'" I almost started crying! How moving is that! It's so incredible that there are still good people in this world. I would have paid for their meal if I had thought of it myself, but I didn't. HA! May God bless that lady! Anyway, the end of the story is the couple was so thankful and the lady in uniform was so moved that she hugged the one who paid for her meal! I will never forget this for as long as I live.

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Thank you to all who have served my country.

katie

Got Any Change?

Last week was a huge reminder of change in my life.

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A change from childhood into adulthood.

A change from life to death.

A change from light to dark.

A change...

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I'm not very good with change to begin with, especially when that person or place or event has been in my life for long. It will take me a lifetime to get used to the fact that my Daddy is no longer here on this earth. I may know that he is not here and I may cope with it but I will never be used to it or okay with it. You know, when he passed away, people said, "Think of God as your Daddy". Well thanks for the advice, but it's not the same. But trusting in my Lord makes it better and bearable.

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I hope that one day there will be a big change that I'm excited about...like marriage! I don't want to be afraid my whole life. I know it will come for me and I honestly cannot wait, but I also know that I have a lot of things to work out in my life before that can happen.

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"And we know that God causes everything

to work together for the good of those who love God

and are called according to His purpose for them."

Romans 8:28 NLT

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I know that He has and will work everything out for my good because I love Him. I cannot wait to see how He has planned my life! I just can't wait!

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Speaking of change, like my blog change? I thought it was time!

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Until next time...

katie

Dear Bekah,

You have no idea what you mean to me. I'm writing you this letter because I could never say this in person. I wouldn't be able to get through it without breaking down.

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You are so special to me, even more now. Your friendship is so incredibly meaningful to me. You're a wonderful listener. You make me laugh a lot! And I know that God meant for our paths to cross in this life. He meant for us to be friends for lots of reasons, this being one of them. I know you've heard the phrase, "Everything happens for a reason." Well, I've never understood it and I still don't. It's possible that I'll never understand it. But in some way, I know it's true. God planned this in such an amazing way to let both of us know that we are never alone. I know that people are put in our lives for incredible reasons. People come and go before us so that we can, in some way, be helped and comforted by their stories and experiences.

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I know you'll remember this. Remember in Grey's when George's dad dies and Christina is talking to him. She welcomes him into the "Club". The Dead Dad's Club. As of Monday night, you became a member, and Bek, it breaks my heart to welcome you into that club. I never like welcoming a new member, nor do I get excited about club meetings or events. But the club discussions truly do bring a comforting feeling and remind me that everyone else feels the same things that I do.

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Remembering my dad and how everything happened, comes in flashes especially in times like these. But our dads will be in our hearts forever. You are an incredible person and through this time you will find out things about yourself, good and bad. My dad's favorite phrase was, "Don't forget Whose you are." Every time I went on a trip or a sleepover, or even something as simple as going to school, he would always tell me not to forget Whose I am. It would remind me to always honor, not only my family with my words and actions, but more importantly--my Heavenly Father.

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Bek, we talked on Wednesday when we had dinner, about people who say they care. But we always wondered where they were beforehand. And soon, I'm afraid, you will wonder where they have gone. Well, even when people forget details and drift away as most will, He never will. He will always be there for you. I also remember a talk a while back about how sometimes that doesn't help. "My dad's not here with me," we say. But Bek, look where he is right now. The most indescribable place we could ever imagine--beyond our imagination! Heaven absolutely just blows my mind when I think about it. I can't stop thinking about the streets of gold and the pearly gates. But more than that, to imagine a place where there is no pain, tears, worry, and sorrow is absolutely incredible. We cannot begin to know what that is like. We are so filled with worry, pain, and grief here on Earth, that we cannot fathom the intensity of Heaven. But he is there with my dad. I just know it.

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I loved your dad, Bek, and I truly cannot believe he is gone and that we are both fatherless. But we need to remember and cling to the fact that our Heavenly Father loves us more than our daddy's ever did. He wants us to come before Him even when we are angry. He can do anything.

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"The Lord your God is with you.

He is mighty to save.

He will take great delight in you,

He will quiet you with His love..."

Zephaniah 3:17

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"Come to Me, all you who

are weary and heavy-burdened

and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28

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Bek, God has shown me so many things about life and death and everything in between. I am just now coming back to Him with all my needs. It takes time to heal and don't you ever let anyone rush you or make you feel bad for not doing things. Grief is an individual process. Just remember, you can always talk to Him--always. He's always there in your heart, all you have to do it talk. He knows what you're thinking anyway so, you might as well just say it out loud. ;)

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I love you so much. You are like a sister to me. Let me know how you're feeling. Tell me you want and need to get out. I am here for you. I will always be here for you. Always, always remember that, ok? Ask me anything you want and I'll tell you what I know and what I've learned. And we will learn some things together. I know what you're going through. I love you.

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All My Love,

katie

A New Year

Happy Anniversary to me! It's been a year ago today that I entered the Blogspot world. I feel like it's been a good year. Lots of things have happened, good and bad. Both that I can and have learned from. I thank God for those experiences!

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To all of my prayer warrior friends, I need you. One of my best friends, Bekah, needs prayer right now. Her whole family needs your prayers right now, especially her dad, Rick. You see, Rick has had cancer for a couple of years now and has been in and out of remission. It has gotten to the point now that he's being sent home tomorrow with Hospice, that is, if he makes it through the night. I pray that he does. The last thing that I want to see is one of my best friends go through a very similar tragedy that I went through almost 4 years ago.

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It's so hard to believe that it will be 4 years in February...

God has been so faithful through the years. He has been able to renew my faith and remain steadfast.

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"Create in me a pure heart,

O God, and renew a steadfast

spirit within me."

Psalm 51:10

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I just hope that Bekah finds the promises that God has bestowed upon me over the years. I know that His promises will be revealed to her in His perfect timing. I cannot wait for Bekah's restoration. I continue to pray for her daily through this time.

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Thanks.

Until next time...

katie

Bagels, Basketball, and Laughter!

Mesha- "Hey Katie, can you make that bagel?"

(sounds easy, right?)

Katie- "Oh yeah, sure." First mistake.

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It is an amazing skill to cut a bagel and cut your finger WITHOUT getting blood on the bagel. Yes, I was wearing gloves...but still. The blood filled up the entire finger in my glove.

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ANYWAY!! This week has been crazy. Monday and Tuesday, I opened at work, watched a little girl both days, AND went to church and helped out with Upward Evaluations for this Spring! Wednesday, I went with my trio to sing at the Lions World Services for the Blind and sang a whole set! It went really well! I could feel God moving and people were enjoying it! And yesterday, I watched my favorite baby, Kate!!

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AAAAND...I finally heard her laugh!!! It was so exciting to finally hear that!! It completely made my week! And today...I cut my finger. A wonderful end to a great week!!

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And this weekend is CITYFEST!! I'm sure I will post pics from there.

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Until then...

Fall Family Festival 2009!

Only One Amazing Race

I hope that all of your weeks started out wonderful!! My week has been busy busy!! Full of pictures and fun! I'll start with Saturday!

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Saturday started out early! The youth at my church always do an "Amazing Race" every year about this time. Well Saturday was it! It was a BLAST!! I drove my team, Olivia and Kinley to Arkadelphia which is about an hour away from here. First we went to a park and did different things around the park then we went to the Spillway (or Dam or whatever you want to call it) for lunch. Lots of fun was had and eventually my team WONN!!! We are amazing. Yes.

So we got finished around 3:45 and I got on the freeway to come home at 4!! I got a call that I needed to babysit at 4:45! Cutting it close, I asked if the time was a little bit flexible. They said absolutely and I got there about 5ish to watch such a precious little baby Olive!

Sunday was the most fun, but I'm thinking I will have to do a whole other post with pictures of our Fall Festival that we had at my church that night! I will just tell you about what I discovered that morning.

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God was apparently trying to get it in my thick skull that He really does know best and that He is Almighty and absolutely incredible. Well in my college Sunday School class, we've started going through 1st and 2nd Thessalonians which has been really interesting. Well we came across a group of 3 verses that I have clung to ever since I read them. I had been thinking about my dad basically the whole weekend. I was just missing him and wishing I could talk to him and see what he would say about a lot of things in my life right now and ask his advice. So, I read these verses:

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"For God chose to save us

through our Lord Jesus Christ,

not to pour out his anger on us.

Christ died for us,

so that whether we are

dead or alive when he returns,

we can live with him forever.

So encourage each other and

build each other up,

just as you are already doing."

1 Thessalonions 5:9-11

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Three incredibly powerful verses. My favorite being verse 10 in bold. That verse is so incredibly comforting to me. Every believer has doubts at some point in time, but I have no more doubts about where my dad is. I know that I will be with him in Heaven someday and I cannot wait.

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"Therefore since we are surrounded

by such a great cloud of witnesses,

let us throw off everything that hinders

and the sin that so easily entangles,

and let us run with perseverance

the race that is marked for us.

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus,

the author and perfecter of our faith, [...]"

Hebrews 12:1-2a

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So have an Amazing Race.

katie

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PS. I am also looking for suggestions for a name for my new blog...I used to be called Miss Katie, if that helps. Looking forward to hearing what you've come up with!

Additional Blog??

If I created a new blog for the adventures that I have babysitting/nannying...would you follow me?

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I have so many stories and pictures that I can share from all kinds of families from all walks of life. They are funny, sad, interesting, frustrating and just plain strange. Would you follow me?

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I hope you all are having a great week so far...it's almost over. I can't wait til Friday! Mainly because I get to watch my new favorite baby, Kate!!

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This little bundle of joy is Kate! She is clearly talking in this picture. I have yet to hear her laugh in my presence yet. But I am hoping and waiting for it on Friday! :) The new blog will be able to let me tell you about my findings as a nanny. I will give bits of advice, funny stories, and great pictures!!

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I'm still thinking of a name of my additional blog, otherwise, I would have a link for you.

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Stay tuned!!

-katie

The "What If" Game

"And we know that God

causes everything to work together

for the good of those

who love God and

are called according to his purpose."

Romans 8:28

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I believe that I've been given a challenge from God.

Imagine that a really really good friend and her husband were in trouble. Imagine that their 4 children would be taken from them. What would you do? Step up or step back? What if you stepped back? How would you feel? Glad you didn't have to deal with it? Ashamed you didn't do more or anything at all? I realize it's not your responsibility...but aren't we supposed to help others, the less fortunate, the widows and orphans? Why is it that we are called to carry these things through but when the opportunity comes up we pass it by, saying we are too busy or don't have the funds or the space?

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God will work everything out if you love Him. I feel like I'm in His plan right now. But right now, I'm just waiting...waiting until He says, "Go." That's all that I can do. I have no control over my circumstances right now. It is absolutely terrifying.

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So, what if you stepped up? Brought the kids in your house and loved them as your own? Your life is turned upside down. Is it worth it? You're in God's plan, right? It's completely worth it. Every minute is a lesson. Every second is an experience. How can it not be worth it?

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What if...

What a phrase. We can play "What if" all day long, right? I can only focus on "What is". And what is right now is life. Love. Blessings. I can't wait to see where God takes me. I feel like he is testing me, almost the way he tested Abraham. God asked him to take Isaac to the mountain (Genesis 22). Even thought I am not giving up my only son, which I don't have, I still feel as though I am following the Lord's calling. These people are in trouble. I will help them, not for me, not for the parents, but for God and the children. I love them so much.

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Trusting God is an interesting concept. I'm putting my life in the hands of someone I have never seen. But I know He's there. I can feel Him. He works in my life. I am so thankful for that.

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Pray for me as God makes things work for me because I love Him.

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"So don't worry about tomorrow,

for tomorrow will bring it's own worries.

Today's trouble is enough for today."

Matthew 6:34 (NLT)

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Until next time...

katie

All Else Fades...

For about a week and a half now, I've been caught up in the words of this beautiful song. It has been coming on everytime I get in my car to go somewhere. Literally, every time. It speaks to me so. I loving getting caught up in the words. I just belt out the song in my car. I probably look like the biggest idiot, drumming on the steering wheel, makin' the "rockin' out" faces and such. Wow...I can just see it. 

"A thousand times I fail

Still your mercy remains

Should I stumble again

Still I'm calling your grace

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades

Never-ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame.

Your will above all else

My purpose remains

The art of losing myself

In bringing you praise

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades

Never-ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame.

My heart and my soul

I give you control

Consume me from the inside out

Let justice and praise become my praise

To love you from the inside out

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades

Never-ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame.

And the cry of my heart is to bring you praise from the inside out

My soul cries out

I give you control

Consume me from the inside out

Let justice and praise become my praise

To love you from the inside out"

-Seventh Day Slumber

These words have been on my heart lately and I thought I'd share them with you! This song is so powerful. The actual title is "From the Inside Out" by Seventh Day Slumber. 

I hope your week has been good so far. Mine has been fine. Today was just ok. It's about to get better though. It's choir time. All my stress and such melts away when I sing. When I am praising my Jesus, it's the best time. I hope it's the same with you.

-katie

Ups and Downs

You know those times...times when you want to crawl in a hole and just stay there until that bit of time passes? Well...I felt a bit like that yesterday.

A friend of mine that I haven't seen in years came into where I work (notice the anonymity) and we started chatting. I went to Elementary school with her son and she was my chaperone on a trip from those years. So we pulled the usual "how are you's" and "what have you been up to's". After those were answered, she asked how my parents' business was doing. I gave her a nervous chuckle and muttered something like, "oh, you don't know, do you?" And with a confused look on her face, I told her the dreaded news. "My dad passed away three and a half years ago," I said. Within milliseconds her confused look changed into shock. I briefly explained what happened and still shock covered her face. She conveyed her sincerest regrets and we went back to the bit of small talk that was happening before.

I never know how to handle those situations. Those people whom I haven't seen in ages say their sorry's and hug me with the most love they can possibly give, but I still feel bad. Not because it reminds me that my dad isn't with us anymore, but because I'm bringing sadness to them. I'm the type of person who is happy most all the time. That is my mood. Happy. But when I have to tell people about my dad going to be with Jesus, the mood drops. And there are only a few times when it recovers back to those happy moments before the horrible news, depending on the person and their view on life.

I hate those moments. I hate giving people news that is going to make them sad. I mean, they are expecting to hear, "Yeah, we still have The Hop and we are loving it! We are all doing amazingly!" Instead they are hearing, "He passed away three and a half years ago and we don't know why." It's very depressing having to tell them that. I know I'm not the only one who knows this feeling. It's awful.

Just a little rant...

-katie

"The Tragedy of the Unopened Gift"

Happy Fall, Y'all!!!!!

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It's Bible Study time here in the big L-R!

My church hosts Bible studies in the fall every year in different people's houses. It's a great time of year. We get to eat and just hang out with great people and worship Him by being in fellowship with fellow believers. It's such a great feeling! And I love my Small Group! Mary, Jennifer, Amanda (the hostess), Shawn, and Vicki are all in our group as of now. Anyway, we are doing a study from the book called, "If You Want to Walk on Water, You've Got to Get Out of the Boat" by John Ortberg. It's a study about learning to trust God and it centers around Peter's adventure of walking on water.

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How much courage did it take for Peter to step out of the boat with all those other people back in the boat saying--no way, man, there's no way I'm getting out of this boat, I will sink! If I could just remember to keep my eyes on Him...I can only imagine what could be. I try to trust God with my whole heart but it is incredibly difficult. We always want to be in control. As a human being, we feel that we can handle anything that comes our way. But we can't. I can't. I am so incapable of doing the simplest thing without His hands. I truly do not see how people go through the hard times without Him. I can't imagine where I'd be if He wasn't my King.

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Sorry, I got side tracked. Sunday, we talked about gifts. We read Matthew 25:14-30; the story of the talents. Why did he give 5, 2, and 1? Why did the man with the one talent not invest his talent? Why didn't he seize the opportunity he was presented? Fear. Fear of what? Failure? Disappointment?

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Do you have a gift? What is it? You can tell me, really.

Are you doing something with your gift? If so, what? Go on! Tell me! I want to know...

If not, why not? It's ok...

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I have been thinking about my gift since that question was asked. Several answers have gone through my head and I still don't know if any of these are worth mentioning.

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Possible Gifts:

--Singing...I love to sing but I am horribly shy when it comes time to sing in front of others. I consider my voice a blessing that I can share. I love that my mom and I are able to sing together in church every so often. In the end, I'm singing to my Provider, my Comforter, and my Father.

--Children...I cannot express the joy that I feel when I'm with kids. I am definitely a kid at heart even though I'm only 21. I love their lust for life! Nothing is wrong in their world. The innocence in their smiles. Their carefree laughter. *Sigh* I wish I was 5.

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I'm so blind to myself. Do you have any suggestions? What are my gifts? I really want to know!

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I'd like to share a beautiful quote from author Gregg Levoy, entitled "The Tragedy of the Unopened Gift".

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"To sinful patterns of behavior that never get confronted and changed,

Abilities and gifts that never get cultivated and deployed --

Until weeks become months

And months turn into years,

And one day you're looking back on a life of

Deep, intimate, gut-wrenchingly honest conversations you never had;

Great bold prayers you never prayed,

Exhilarating risks you never took,

Sacrificial gifts you never offered,

Lives you never touched,

And you're sitting in a recliner with a shriveled soul,

And forgotten dreams, and you realize there was a world of desperate need,

And a great God calling you to be part of something bigger than yourself --

You see the person you could have become but did not;

You never followed your calling.

You never got out of the boat.

--Gregg Levoy

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I'm going to make a conscious effort to step out of my boat. Step out into unfamiliar territory and follow God's plan for my life. Follow my dreams. Do everything that I can for Him so I can hear the words that many before me have already heard, including my own father.

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"Well done, my good and faithful servant."

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Everyone has a gift. It is most likely that you have more than one gift. What's yours?

Speechless...

A lot of things are going through my head right now and I can't seem to pick which one to write about so, I'm not going to write about any of them.

Why? How? When?

One thing I know and want:

"But as for me, behold,

I am in your hands;

do with me as is

good and right in your sight."

--Jeremiah 26:14

Thank You, Lord, for this verse.

I'm so glad that I can put myself in God's hands and never have to worry about anything. He is my Provider (Mt. 6:11). He is my Comforter (Ps 69:20). He is the I AM (Exodus 3:14).

How can you not know?

--katie

Reevaluation

I just reread my blogpost entitled "Joy". I hate that I have focused on what my dad has missed. Why can't I focus on what he did while he was here with us? Well...here it goes:

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I don't know much about his life...but, I do know that he loved his childhood. He spent a lot of time with his grandparents. His grandmother who he called, Ging, was apparently an amazing cook, as was his mother. Ging and Grandad lived in an incredible house in Clarksville. I have been there and it is truly an amazing house. Wrap around porches have never been so appealing. It's beautiful and it has been named an historic landmark. My dad loved spending summers there with his sister, Bettye, brother, Fletcher, and cousins, Beth and Jane--and I'm sure a few others. Aunt Bettye, Uncle Fletcher, Beth, and Jane all tell amazing stories of those times. I live for those stories. There's a favorite story of mine that involves eating rotten Easter eggs and getting sick! :)

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I'm going to skip ahead to the last 30 years. Uncle Fletcher, Dad's brother, was getting married. Dad was apart of it, obviously. My mom's friend was the bride. So my parents met and were married 3 months later, I believe is how the story goes. November 3rd, 1978, a wedding was had and many attended. They said "I do" and spent 27 years together. Almost 10 years after they were married, they had me! What a blessing! *rolls eyes* ;) Frank and Connie became parents. They loved it and still do. I was a Daddy's girl with a best friend as a Mom. What a team!

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My dad went through several different job, which is where I get it from. He spent a lot of time in the food service industry. Cooking for KFC and Izzy's, owning The Spot & The Hop Drive-In, and several other places. Owning The Hop Drive-In was the best 6 years of our lives. We worked together as a family serving people, our favorite past-time.

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He always had great advice too: Follow your heart. Don't forget Whose you are. Love. Laugh at yourself. Dad wanted me to be a teacher and personally I can't think of anything I wouldn't want to do more. I guess he figured that I'm good with kids and am able to relate to them easily. I'm a kid at heart after all. And I love helping people, especially people in need.

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I am so blessed to have a man who loved me. Not only a father, but a Daddy. I love you, Daddy, and I miss you.

Artsy Fartsy

I love to doodle and create different things for people. Often pottery is my craft of choice. I always love going and picking out my colors and utensils and plate or bowl or whatever. But my favorite thing about creating these things is the look on the faces of the recipients! The look of absolute shock that I would think enough to do that for them. That's what I love to do though!!

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This particular plate below was made for *horn blows* a little girl named Kelley who I nannied for in 2007. And she is shown below the plate.

^^Kelley Grace

I made this plate when my childhood friend, Kali Sparks, passed away May 28, 2008. We went to pretty much all of school together--preschool through graduation. She was an angel and now she really does have her wings. I miss her. More so, I miss her presence in this world. We weren't very close but I will always miss her.

I made the below pieces just because I love art.

This is the inside of the above pictures. And the random yellow spots are just a reflection. The one in the middle is the only true yellow.

the end.