Morning Rant

Since my last post, I've been thankful for life (no specific day necessarily).
I've been thankful for common sense and the ability to know right from wrong. (Is that the same thing?)


I woke up this morning, earlier than usual. I showered and got ready. I had a little time before I had to leave for work, so my mom and I started talking--mistake #1. We talked about family and such. She had mentioned that my aunt (who lives out of town) never helps out with their mom, which, however true that is (only slightly), Mom doesn't exactly spend time with their mom much either. She'll do things for her like go get her prescriptions and go get lunch for her, but not like we used to. We used to go to dinner with Granny at least once a week, sometimes even twice. I still do, but Mom doesn't. Why, you ask? Oh, because in her words, "I'm busy." Oh, she's not busy. Let's talk about busy for a second. The only real time that I have Sunday-Saturday, is Friday night, Saturday, & Sunday after church. I have no time during the week to do anything. Period. That will all change soon. But, she would just rather spend time with her fiance, that she doesn't spend a day apart from. And what do they do? They watch TV, have dinner, and talk. Swamped, she is. Anyway, I told her all of this and she had nothing to say back. She said, "you're right." I'm thinking, what's new?

I just all of a sudden got frustrated about life this morning. I'm sick of the way I feel all day long. I hate going to work. I hate being bored out of my skull every single day. I hate the way I feel about my mom sometimes. I hate that I don't have a clue what I'm going to be doing in 6 weeks when my job ends. I hate the way I look. All I want is a plan. I want to know part of the future. I want to know if I should really be a teacher or if God has something else for me. I'm so sick of not knowing things. I put my life in God's hands and I'm glad I did. I would just like a little hint of my future. I plan on trusting God the entire way. Just.... Anything?

Hope this made sense. If it didn't--I don't care. I feel better getting it out.
-katie

P.S. Today, I'm thankful for the weekend.

Days 12 & 13 & 14

Day #12:
November 12th--

Saturday, I was and still am thankful for family, especially my aunt and grandmother. We woke up early and went on our yearly trip to Holiday House, which is kind of like a vendor type deal. Different vendors came from all over the state, south, and beyond. There was someone there from PA! Anyway, They just sell their product. They have everything from cooking utensils to Christmas ornaments to clothes to all kinds of pointless things. I was thankful for a day just to shop and spend time with family. My aunt and I have gotten so close since my dad passed, which I love. And my grandmother and I are very close. We see each other, usually once a week. She spoils me and so does my aunt.

Day #13:
November 13th--

Yesterday I was thankful for rest and music. I had absolutely nothing to do yesterday which was the most beautiful thing in the world. I took a nap and was lazy almost the entire day. Yesterday, at my church, we dedicated our organ. So we had a special recital that featured a couple of wonderful organists. David Howard Pettit played some beautiful numbers including some of his original works. I am in awe of what this organ can do. It has a setting that can sound like a woman/women and man/men singing alleluias and amens. It was eerily amazing. My jaw was on the floor--just the coolest thing.

Day #14:
November 14th--

Today I am thankful for wonderful opportunities. I'm thankful for my job. I'm thankful to come into a loving home and take care of the cutest 18-month-old in the world! I'm thankful for the last 14 months with this family. Being a nanny is so rewarding. Being able to teach and love and laugh with this little boy every day is priceless. Part of me wishes I could do this for the rest of my life, but I know that's unrealistic. These people have meant so much to me and have done so much for me this past year and 2 months. They are incredible! I will miss them when I leave at the end of this year. And I pray blessings on this family and especially Pierce who will be going to day care in January. I pray for continued good health and lots of learning!

Hope you all had a thankful weekend.
-katie

Day #11

While I should be/am thankful 365 days, here goes day 11 for the Month of Thankfulness:

Today I am thankful for the men and women who serve in the military including my cousin, Blake Grimmett (I don't know what his official title is).

Pledging his life to his country

Blake & me - home from boot camp

Blake & me at his rehearsal dinner

 My cousin Tony Francis (don't know his official title either), also serves. I am thankful for his service too.

Two of the most special men in my life, and I love them both. I couldn't imagine how our country would've turned out had it not been for our military.

Thank you both for serving so I can live in a free country. I love you both so much!

-katie

Month of Thankfulness: Days 1-10

I meant to start this last Tuesday when the month started, but alas, I did not. Shame on me. Anyway, I'm starting it now, PLUS, I'm catching up! So here goes nothin'!

Day #1:
November 1st--
Last Tuesday, the first day of the month, I was and still am thankful for Jon, Jen, and Kate McCalmont! I watch Kate while Jon and Jen have a date night once a week. It's kind of cute. These people mean so incredibly much to me. They have been way more like friends than bosses, which is wonderful. This is probably 1 of 2 families that I've never had a problem dealing with. ANYWAY, this precious family is what I was thankful for the first day of the month and am thankful for today and everyday. They've done so much for me both in the physical life and the spiritual life of me. They are incredible. Love you guys.

Day #2:
November 2nd--
When I go to Texas to visit my godchildren, I go a day before so I don't drive 9 hours there and back all at once. Last Wednesday, was one of those leave-after-work-drives. The wind and rain was horrible. And I was driving my mom's Honda Accord. I DO NOT like how those things handle in the rain. Maybe it's just that I'm used to driving my Jeep Patriot. This day I was thankful for the Hilton's, Erica and Shane, for letting me stay so many times on the way to visit my babies. I've so enjoyed getting to know them both and I'm so excited for the arrival of their daughter in the next month!!

Day #3:
November 3rd--
On this day many years ago, my parents were married. On this day, I was thankful for their relationship and their example of how communication and love is supposed to be. I'm grateful that I was not a child of divorce. I'm thankful that I had a father who loved my mother. That is so important in the development of a child. We learn from example, after all. And while my Daddy isn't here to celebrate another year with my mom, he is always with us--in our hearts--and that will always be their day.

Day #4
November 4th--
Friday, I was grateful for the Ripa's. This is the family I work for right now. I've nannied for them since last August. Their son, Pierce, is crazy, precious, hilarious, and just plain adorable. He makes me laugh. Jennifer and Dave, his parents, are so wonderful. They are funny, sweet, and selfless. Jennifer has done so much for me. She convinced me to go back to school, which I am so incredibly thankful for.

Day #5
November 5th--
Saturday, I was and will always be thankful for the Tucker's. We started out as boss/employee then quickly grew into friends. They are now family. Their soon-to-be 5 kids are my godchildren, so this family clearly means a lot to me. But on this 5th day of November, I'm especially thankful for Cameron, the current baby that I mentioned in my last post. This day was his 7th Birthday. I can't even believe he's 7. He was a brand-new come-home-from-the-hospital newborn, when I met this family. All of these kids are so special to me. I don't know where I'd be without them, and I sure don't want to find out.

Day #6
November 6th--
I was especially grateful for my faith and God's beautiful creation. I am thankful for the opportunity to worship in a free country with whoever I want, wherever I want. God is so good. And worshipping with my godchildren was one of the most special events of the weekend. I loved looking over to see them singing along to the hymns. Driving 9 hours from San Antonio to Little Rock is absolutely beautiful. The colors of fall made leaving my babies almost okay. I love the reds, greens, yellows, oranges, and even browns.

Day #7
November 7th--
Monday I was grateful for my friendship with Kali Nichole Sparks. I went to school with Kali, all the way from Pre-K to graduation. I was thankful to know this precious angel of a person and have her in my life. Her smile lit up a room. 11-7 is her birthday. She will be forever 20. Kali was one of the unfortunate casualties in the Florida accident in May a few years ago. I wasn't really in her "group" in high school, but we were friends. I have a picture of me and Kali in my room from Senior Prom. Her light for God shone so brightly and now she's in His presence having the biggest party. I miss her.

Day #8
November 8th--
Tuesday, I was grateful for an incredible family, the Page's. Sean, Amanda, Bear, and Judah are so important to me and my life. I knew Amanda and Bear before Sean and Judah came along. Amanda is like a sister to me and I love her so much. Wouldn't trade her for the world! :) And I am so happy for her in finding her a husband like Sean. He is so wonderful to her and Bear and he is a GREAT father to Bear and Judah. 11-8 was Bear's 7th birthday--part of the reason I am thankful for them on this day.

Day #9
November 9th--
Yesterday, I had class and it got me thinking how thankful I am for the opportunity to get to go back and actually get my degree. I owe it all to God, firstly. Second, I'm thankful for my mom's fiance, Tim. He is paying for me to go to school and get my degree. I don't think there are words for how grateful I am for this kind gesture. And I'm thankful for the drive I have right now. I pray that I keep wanting to go forward.

Day #10
November 10th--
Today I am grateful for my parents(not the same as #3). I am thankful for the time (almost 18 years) I got to spend with my dad before he left this earth. I am thankful that I took after him in a lot of ways. It makes it easier for me to remember him. Of course, I look exactly like him, so that kinda helps.  I am thankful for the relationship that I have with my mom. Even though we fight and disagree, we love each other and understand where the other person is coming from. She is my best friend. I'm thankful my upbringing even though I find some of it a little ridiculous. I will use some to most of how I was brought up for my children if God blesses me with any. I'm grateful to be brought up in a Christian faith with believing parents and extended family on both sides. So thankful.

What are you thankful for??
-katie
P.S. Sorry for the lack of pictures. Maybe next time.

2 Weekends - 2 Birthdays

I. Am. Pooped.

I've been to San Antonio and back the past 2 weekends. There was good reason though. I mean reasons. As the title gives away, two of my godchildren had birthdays these past 2 weekends and I didn't miss them!

Tori (the oldest) turned 16 last Friday. I can't believe this girl is 16. When I met this family, Tori had just turned 9-years-old. I barely remember that 9-year-old. I remember a cute, quiet, willing little girl. Mature and loving.

She is now a golden-hearted 16-year-old, who is absolutely gorgeous (as you can see). She is still quiet at times. Still mature. Still very willing and very loving. But she's not so little anymore. She loves her Savior and knows that He's there for her. She'll be able to move out next year, if she wants. She'll be going to college in less than 2 years. (I sure hope, I'm done with college before she is!)

Father God, protect my sweet Tori. Help

her remember that you are always with her

and will never be anywhere else. 

Give her strength for the days and rest for the nights.

Help her remember that what's going on

is only "for now". This too shall pass.

Let her know she is loved and cherished

and she shouldn't settle for anything less.

In Your Son's Precious Name, Amen.

Birthday #2 was the current baby of the family. Cameron turned 7-years-old this past Saturday. This crazy, hilarious little boy was brand new when I first met this family. And when I say brand new, I mean it. They were at the hospital having him when I was called. I think I was the first non-family member to meet him except for the hospital staff. 

Anyway, this little boy stole my heart from the moment I met him. And as he has grown he's done nothing less than put a smile on my face. He is the most hilarious child I've ever met in my life. Even if he's making one of his "You're a chicken head" jokes--the joy he gets out of telling his jokes and how much he laughs at them, you just can't help but hysterically laugh. 

Father God, I pray that as Cameron grows

he finds you. I pray that he goes crazy over you

and loves learning about you and loves having

a relationship with you. I pray protection

over him as well. That you will pursue him and

let him know that you're always with him.

I pray that he grows up to be a man

of God. That he will grow in stature and knowledge.

In Your Son's Name, Amen.

I will be posting my Days of Thankfulness in the next coming days. And yes, I will be catching up with the days that I've missed.

--katie

Stay Tuned...

I am cooking up a really good entry that will be posted in the very near future! Can you guess what it's about? Probably not...

Good Luck!
-katie

Update on Life

I have had absolutely no motivation for just about everything in my life lately.

No motivation for school--yes, I'm back in school (YAY!). I'm supposed to be reading right now.

No motivation for exercising.

No motivation for blogging.

No energy overall.

The only thing that gets me energized or excited anymore is getting to go see my godchildren. I cannot wait to see them in less than 2 weeks! Sometimes, I think it would be easier for me to just move down there. That's another post.

"My flesh and my heart may fail,

but God is the strength of my heart

and my portion forever."

--Psalm 73:26

I've also had a hard time with actually nailing down a major to focus on in my college experience. Speech Therapy? Teaching? Business? Culinary Arts? There are so many choices! In my opinion, there are two reasons why I've had such a hard time declaring a major. 1--My mom killed my dream of a Neonatal Nurse with reality(forget that I'm not that great with science)...and 2--all I've ever wanted to be is a Mom. That's the only consistency in my life desires. So keeping in mind the future family that I plan to have, I think I'd rather be a Teacher. I'm scared to death of this decision, but it's been sticking for about a week now, so I feel pretty confidant that it will be around for a long time. Pray me through this friends. I'm gonna need it!

Also, an UPDATE on my goddaughter Trinity. She's back at home now which is good for the family. They did find out that she has a tumor, which I believe is benign, at the base of her skull located in between the pituitary gland and her brain stem, I believe. Please pray that the tumor will not be there when they go back in 2 months. It's happened before and I know that God can do this. I believe it. I'm going to commit to praying everyday and whenever I think about it until they go back. I'll also be posting my prayers on my prayer blog. I believe that God is still in the miracle business. I hope that you are too.

How can you say no to praying for this beautiful little girl and her healing??

~PRAY FOR TRINITY~

-katie

Intercede, Friends, Intercede

I'm trying to figure out how to start this post and I just cannot find the words. Instead of thinking about what I want to say, I'm just going to spit it out.

Last night/Early this morning, I got a call from the mother of my godchildren. We had been playing phone tag and she finally got ahold of me at midnight--yes, I was sleeping. I figured she just wanted to chat and this was an "I'll call you back tomorrow" call. It wasn't. We talked about how things were going with them. She started telling me about doctors appointments for the kids.

My precious Kaleb has a form of Autism called Aspergers. He has some problems in social settings especially being bullied. Anyway, he's had some problems with his lazy eye and it turns out that his brain has actually turned that eye off. BUT, the God-thing is that his vision in that eye, is 20/20! This is SUCH a blessing, friends. You see, if he didn't have perfect vision in this eye, they couldn't do surgery to fix it. Since he does have perfect vision in that eye, they CAN fix it! Praise the Lord! And yet, in spite of this great news, she was about to tell me something that would keep me up half the night and not have a good night's sleep when I did finally get to sleep.

My sweet little Trinity has been having some trouble lately. Trouble with her endocrine system, to be specific--and that's as specific as I need to be. All-in-all, the doctors had to do an x-ray and if it comes back showing that her "bone age" is more than 8, she could have a tumor. Benign or not, this is a huge burden.

Last night, I kept telling Holly, Trinity's mom, we need to start praying and we don't need to stop.

"Always be joyful.

Never stop praying.

Be thankful in all circumstances,

for this is God's will for you

who belong to Christ Jesus."

--1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

After we hung up, I was going to talk to God. I really like praying at night when I'm in bed. I used to think falling asleep while praying was something terrible, but now I love falling asleep in the arms of my Lord. It's probably my favorite thing. But this time, I couldn't find the words to express my feelings or distress. It's still hard for me to know what I really want to say. Part of me wants to explode and ask God why He would do this to my little Trinity. And the other part of me knows that there's no point. There's no point in getting mad and asking "why?". I've learned from experience that it doesn't help. So what did I pray, you ask? It went a little something like this:

Father, I need you more than ever right now.

God, I'm praying for my sweet goddaughter,

Trinity Celeste Tucker. I'm interceding on her behalf

to ask You, the God of the Universe, 

Jehovah Rophi--God who Heals, 

to put your Healing Hand on her little body.

I'm asking for a complete healing. I want the doctor's to 

scratch their heads in disbelief. I want your power

to be SO evident that there isn't any doubt of 

who is at work. Father, Trinity has such a heart for you.

She loves talking about you and to you. She is 

amazed by you. I wish I had her faith. I'm begging

You to heal her completely. May all the glory go to You.

We will praise no one other than the

One who created her. But overall, Father, I pray that 

Your Will Be Done.

Thank You, Father. I love you.

Amen.

My belief is in the power of the Lord. May He be glorified through this trial and may He heal my sweet little Trinity. I believe He can.

I believe...

One Day...

Hello friends! I was once again a travelin' gal this past weekend. This time I was in Springfield, MO. I was there for the weekend spending some time with my cousin and his wife, Jarrod and Caira. My aunt and I drove up after I got off work on Thursday. I was so glad to have a day off and a weekend to spend with family. These 3 people mean so much to me. I can't imagine my life without these people in my life.

Caira & Jarrod on their wedding day (May '08)

I went up there for Caira's BABY shower on Saturday!! I'm so excited that these 2 people are embarking on yet another wonderful journey together.

Their baby is a GIRL!! And they will name her Addisyn Preslee when she makes her debut sometime around November 29th! I cannot wait to meet this precious blessing. She is already so loved and so wanted. I hope she knows how much her parents and extended family loves her. I know she will. And I know that she will know the love of God. Gosh, I just cannot wait until Thanksgiving! This kid is going to be so spoiled--I can't wait to be apart of it.

Also, a very Happy Birthday to Jarrod!!! He turns 30 today. He's like a big brother to me. I just love him so much!

I so admire Jarrod and Caira as people and in their marriage. There is communication, fun, love, respect, and fairness. I hope I find the same thing she found. One day, friends, one day... In the mean time, I will seek the one who made me and pursue him because he pursued me first.

Hope you all have a great long weekend!!
-katie

Willis's--May '11

Cate--13

Graham--11

My little model!

She is beautiful!!

All-American Boy--Jackson--15

We are special.

They love me.